Are you sitting down?
Really? I mean seriously? Are you sitting? Because I take no responsibility for what will happen if you’re standing and you read this post.
OK, now take a deep breath and try not to panic. Find a happy place. You there yet? You found it? No? It’s OK, I’ll wait….
Alright… here we go. There is (GASP!) an ATHEIST in Congress!!!!!!!!
How did one of those sneaky bastards get in? I mean, come on, they only represent about 1 out of every 10 Americans. How dare they represent 1 out of 435 Congressional members?!?!?! HOW DARE THEY!!! Don’t they realize that they are outnumbered about 8 to 1 in the population by Christians and 9 to 1 by theists in general? What right does one single solitary 75-year-old congressman have bringing his lack of belief into an arena in which he is outnumbered 434 to 1?!?!? It’s the end of America, the land of the free (Christians) and the home of the brave (Christians).
I for one am appalled. I’m sure he’s going to bring up a bill to “throttle any school child who bows his or her head in prayer” and “establish a right for liberals to bash Christians and berate God around the clock”, just as soon as he can. It’s certainly time “that religious Americans stood-up to the liberal bullies who are so determined to use the power of government to silence prayer and every other religious expression of free speech”.
How dare he?
More From Ryan Sutter
- watcher of the skies
- the big issues of the day
- the weekend
- the week of kloey
- Games, Sister Cities and The End of the World
